Thursday, 27 May 2010

A poem about me 'The Dumper'

Along the front where seagulls hop

There came a sound of plip n’plop

By Council plaque beside a bench

‘To Sid and Rose’… an acrid stench

Of peaceful thoughts where memories dwell

Replaced by rancid shitty smell

Now aged eyes that watched the sea

All now look out, for shit and pee

Those ballroom feet survived the blitz

Now do two-step, around the shits

Smudged all up, his Zimmer frame!

A liquid turd…but who’s to blame?

Survived the war and done his bit

Then swallowed up by acrid shit!

Council poop bins all in vain

As ‘The Dumper’ strikes again

People sunning on the beach

All gasp in awe then puke and reach

Amidst the stones and flocking birds

Lay soft and mushy….slushy turds!!!!

Even council cleanup crew

Put on masks then run and spew

…..Poor cleanup crew, their work is bleak

Cos Park got hit…the other week

A passing woman stopped to snigger

At slushy turd and council digger

Then cried in vain to urge her hound

Not to roll in rancid mound

To top this vile amazing feat

The turd he then, commenced to eat!

The cleanup crew looked in dismay

As dog and walker went their way

'I’ll be back soon'….came forth the shout

'So wear your gloves…. keep-good lookout!'

‘There’s more to come…! my council chums’

“I’m heading straight for Morrisons!

My laccy pills they keep in stock

….the curries make them nice and hot!”

“Just six pills…..I shit sublime!!!

My arse is working overtime!”

A Simple thing like rancid crap

Could put this town right on the map!

You’ll keep your jobs…and pay your tax

And get to clean up rancid craps

Floods of tourists overnight!!

Will come to view the re-vamped sight

'I’ve done the best to do my thing

But can’t stop now …my ring doth sting!'

With that… the dumper went her way

but planned to strike another day…..

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